Have you ever noticed that when you’re with a truly nice guy—say, one who sends flowers to your mom and you just to get through the winter—you feel pressured to pick up your own game and be the best wife or girlfriend this man has ever seen? It turns out that standing out from the crowd doesn’t need a lot of time or even effort. Here’s how to be a better girlfriend.
1. Tell him out loud that you adore him.
You are sending a message to your partner that you think he is the best and that everyone else should agree by using subtle—the crucial word here is subtle—PDA, such as a thigh graze at dinner or a kiss mid-roll, or by bragging about his most recent professional accomplishment to partygoers.
2. Resolve his issues, not him.
Bring him soup if he’s unwell; don’t tell him to wash his hands more frequently. While men value encouragement, they frequently reject efforts to influence or badger them.
3. Vary the compliments you provide.
When you know he’s intensifying his workouts, feel free to compliment him on how hot his biceps are, but don’t forget to go beyond the physical as well. My male friend recently said, “What I truly love to hear is when a woman can pinpoint what makes me unique.”
4. Show his pal’s respect.
You’ve already done your best to please your partner by cooking for him, so it’s time to focus on his friends. Next time you go on a group adventure, buy a round of beer for the crew or offer to bake snacks for their regular game night. They’ll soon be praising you as well.
5. Let him have sex exclusively.
Yes, sexual activity should promote mutual fulfillment. Tell your guy that tonight is all about him every so often, though. Without expecting anything in return, offer to assist him in finding alternative methods of relaxation to watching TV. Alternately, give him complete control in the bedroom, letting him decide on the poses and level of intensity that will make him happiest.
6. Impress him by dressing up for a romantic evening.
Comfort above sex appeal is perfectly acceptable, but guys do notice when you make an additional effort specifically for them. For me, it’s as easy as adding a few curls to my hair before a Skype date; for you, it might mean switching your next night out from flats to heels.
7. Add unexpected elements to your routine.
Send him a card just because, or prepare his favorite dish when you see asparagus on sale at the grocery store. Even the smallest surprises have a significant impact on your relationship, so they don’t need to be elaborate or expensive.
8. Send sexts to him.
The majority of men will love a brief “I can’t wait to rip your clothes off tonight”; of course, warn him if it’s NSFW. A quick sext informs him that you find him seductive and that he will have some activity tonight.
9. Show his parents additional courtesy.
Even though you are already kind and complimentary, you can make a stronger parental impression by sending them birthday cards and bringing baked goods when you visit their houses. The team who helped to raise this amazing man will appreciate your additional consideration and respect.
10. Participate in his passions.
My friend’s husband could discuss politics all day and night; when he does, she picks up a book and closes her eyes. Instead, she loaned him an ear, posed interesting questions, and forwarded him news stories that would catch his attention in order to score significantly more points. Engage your man in what he enjoys, whether it be sports, music, or craft beer, even if it’s not your cup of tea.